Jesus Became Weak for Me!

On this the holiest of weeks, when we take a pilgrimage with Jesus that will take Him through the highs and lows of His ultimate purpose, I find myself sick. I am a worship leader with no voice. This is causing a wrestling inside of me that speaks to identity and frustration with my own body. I long to be present to this holy time, but I am caught in my frailty and disoriented.

This was not how I saw this week going.

I have planned for weeks: tons of music, rehearsals, prayers, edits, and booklets, and here I sit, nursing myself with hot tea and being told to be quiet by everyone around me. The rasp in my voice and my swollen throat remind me of my own limitations.

I don’t like having to admit that I need help or relying heavily on volunteers to do the heavy lifting of Holy Week. But then I remember…

Jesus became weak for me.

• …he had no form or majesty that we should look at him, and no beauty that we should desire him. He was despised and rejected by men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief; and as one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not. (Isaiah 53:2-3)
• And [Mary] gave birth to her firstborn son and wrapped him in swaddling cloths and laid [Jesus] in a manger, because there was no place for them in the inn. (Luke 2:7)
• And Jesus said to him, “Foxes have holes, and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay his head.” (Matthew 8:20)
• For you know the grace of your Lord Jesus Christ, that though he was rich, yet for your sake he became poor, so that you by his poverty might become rich. (2 Corinthians 8:9)
• Jesus couldn’t even carry His own cross.
  As they went out, they found a man of Cyrene, Simon by name. They compelled this man to carry his cross. (Matthew 27:32)

This present suffering, not nearly what our Lord and Savior went through, is inviting me into understanding that I must trust the Father’s will, much like Jesus at Gethsemane; that God provides what and who is needed at the right time, just as He provided a ram for Abraham, and gave His only begotten Son, Jesus for our salvation; that in my weakness, He will be strong, and He will receive the glory.

The disciples, too, in that upper room, must have felt so disoriented when Jesus turned their Passover into a completely different kind of feast, and started talking about dying. This was their Messiah! He was supposed to overthrow the Roman government and set up a theocracy where Israel would reign over the world! What could He be talking about? When our lives are turned upside down and our plans don’t work out like we thought they should, where do we go? To whom do we turn? Peter said it best, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life, and we have believed, and have come to know, that you are the Holy One of God.”

We go to Jesus with our need. We go to Jesus for our example, “Thy will be done.” Some things, like my frustration at my inability to control my own body, my identity wrapped up in my role, my fear at releasing well-laid plans – these need to die so that there will be a greater Resurrection. A Resurrection that is focused on Jesus, and His work in weakness on my behalf so that I can be raised out of darkness and into everlasting light. With that promise, I can raise whatever is left of my voice and cry with all of God’s people, “Alleluia, He is risen! Christ is risen indeed, Alleluia!”